So, I am still working out the details on how I am going to work all this out.
I think the best way to do this, for now, is to give a run-down at the start of each day of how I did the day before. That way I am only blogging it once a day. I will close each entry with the plan for the current day. This way, every success of the day before will be fresh in my mind as I begin the new day, and get another step closer to feeling like the better version of myself I know I can be.
Yesterday, I did pretty well, for being a total wreck. My biggest temptations are always overeating, or over indulging in flirtation. So yesterday, I did my best to do neither. I ate more than I would have liked, yes, but not so much that I was numb. This morning, after talking to you, my new friends, I am going to follow the last rule of the day and do something kind to myself. I am going to get away from this computer and walk from my house to Prospect Park and back. Then, I am going to go to Manhattan and see my BFF Jackie and my godsons. Maybe I will even take the boys for an ice cream so Jackie can have some time to herself...I haven't felt like doing anything lately, so day 1 has already made an impact. Yes, I am still crying, yes I am still hurting, but right now, for the first time in a long time, I don't feel alone.
Now, with day 1 firmly in the past, let's start day 2...
No Excesses, Ever!
Cat, are you LIVING in my head right now??? I just want to be so over indulgent that it isn't funny! So, instead of that bowl of Ben & Jerry's I REALLY want for breakfast, I am going to try to get back on to my normal track. Which means, also that I have to get my arse out of bed today, no matter how tempted I am to stay in it.
Be Your Own Best Friend
This part of the day brings to mind a song from the old 'Alice In Wonderland' film. "I give myself very good advice/But I very seldom follow it..." I know I am not alone in that feeling. How do I learn to listen to the inner voice, to trust it the way I did in my youth? When I am in this much pain from following my heart, what can my heart do for me now?
I am going to allow the actor in me to play both roles, the role of 'me' and the role of the 'best friend' as if they were two characters in the play that is my life today. I am going to try to fake it till I make it, so to speak. I am also going to promise that I WILL NOT do anything harmful to myself today. Not that I was ever physically in danger from that idea, but emotionally...you get the idea.
Every Day, Do Something Kind for Yourself
Does that mean I have to shower? I know some of you may be laughing at that right now, but those of you who have felt the way I do right now know that getting into the shower can be a trial when you are broken down and battered emotionally. Today, I am committed to picking out a color for my bedroom walls. I am also going to make myself go outside and take that walk I mentioned earlier.
Every Day, Do Something Kind for Someone Else
Can I take a moment to say I LOVE THIS! I have spent my entire career in retail (and hopefully, soon in another field) LOOKING for things that I liked about people. I mentioned earlier that I consider myself a retail therapist. All jokes aside, I always look for something FANTASTIC in every person I meet. The other day, on a packed subway, it was a beautiful silver sweater I just had to compliment. the conversation which followed actually got me past his subway stop without the usual call or text to him that normally comes with it. (of all the places he could live, he HAS to live in the ONE place the subway comes above ground for one stop, making it almost impossible to not think of him!) I have to pass there today again, and I am going to do my best to look at the Hudson, in the opposite direction, rather than look for a glimpse of him...
'Till tomorrow, stay strong, and thanks for standing together with me when I have needed you most, my friends!
I think the best way to do this, for now, is to give a run-down at the start of each day of how I did the day before. That way I am only blogging it once a day. I will close each entry with the plan for the current day. This way, every success of the day before will be fresh in my mind as I begin the new day, and get another step closer to feeling like the better version of myself I know I can be.
Yesterday, I did pretty well, for being a total wreck. My biggest temptations are always overeating, or over indulging in flirtation. So yesterday, I did my best to do neither. I ate more than I would have liked, yes, but not so much that I was numb. This morning, after talking to you, my new friends, I am going to follow the last rule of the day and do something kind to myself. I am going to get away from this computer and walk from my house to Prospect Park and back. Then, I am going to go to Manhattan and see my BFF Jackie and my godsons. Maybe I will even take the boys for an ice cream so Jackie can have some time to herself...I haven't felt like doing anything lately, so day 1 has already made an impact. Yes, I am still crying, yes I am still hurting, but right now, for the first time in a long time, I don't feel alone.
Now, with day 1 firmly in the past, let's start day 2...
No Excesses, Ever!
Cat, are you LIVING in my head right now??? I just want to be so over indulgent that it isn't funny! So, instead of that bowl of Ben & Jerry's I REALLY want for breakfast, I am going to try to get back on to my normal track. Which means, also that I have to get my arse out of bed today, no matter how tempted I am to stay in it.
Be Your Own Best Friend
This part of the day brings to mind a song from the old 'Alice In Wonderland' film. "I give myself very good advice/But I very seldom follow it..." I know I am not alone in that feeling. How do I learn to listen to the inner voice, to trust it the way I did in my youth? When I am in this much pain from following my heart, what can my heart do for me now?
I am going to allow the actor in me to play both roles, the role of 'me' and the role of the 'best friend' as if they were two characters in the play that is my life today. I am going to try to fake it till I make it, so to speak. I am also going to promise that I WILL NOT do anything harmful to myself today. Not that I was ever physically in danger from that idea, but emotionally...you get the idea.
Every Day, Do Something Kind for Yourself
Does that mean I have to shower? I know some of you may be laughing at that right now, but those of you who have felt the way I do right now know that getting into the shower can be a trial when you are broken down and battered emotionally. Today, I am committed to picking out a color for my bedroom walls. I am also going to make myself go outside and take that walk I mentioned earlier.
Every Day, Do Something Kind for Someone Else
Can I take a moment to say I LOVE THIS! I have spent my entire career in retail (and hopefully, soon in another field) LOOKING for things that I liked about people. I mentioned earlier that I consider myself a retail therapist. All jokes aside, I always look for something FANTASTIC in every person I meet. The other day, on a packed subway, it was a beautiful silver sweater I just had to compliment. the conversation which followed actually got me past his subway stop without the usual call or text to him that normally comes with it. (of all the places he could live, he HAS to live in the ONE place the subway comes above ground for one stop, making it almost impossible to not think of him!) I have to pass there today again, and I am going to do my best to look at the Hudson, in the opposite direction, rather than look for a glimpse of him...
'Till tomorrow, stay strong, and thanks for standing together with me when I have needed you most, my friends!
No comments:
Post a Comment